how apt
Do you know I can’t remember the last time we kissed. Cause you never think the last time is the last time. You think there’ll be more.
You think you have forever but you don’t. Plus my conditioner decided to stop working and I think I have brittle bones. I just, I just need something to happen.
I need a sign that things are going to change. I need a reason to go on. I need some hope. And in the absence of hope I need to stay in bed and feel like I might die today.
anti social
i am feeling anti-social.
fren made this comment about me:
d: I can give her a rock and she will be talking to it!
an entire monologue!
we don't have forever
Yesterday I was feeling rather off form. It went like this: It hits me like every once in a while that we don't have forever. Time is therefore limited and precious so I ought to make the most out of whatever I have. Therefore, why am i wasting this limited time doing things that i don't wanna do? Such as, work? Ok i need the money. then again, why can't money just rain from the sky? I sound like some petulant brat. The kid who can't wait and insists on instant gratification. I can't wait to travel. I can't wait to have enough money for travelling simple because i don't know when i will die. I don't want to live the irony of having slogged my entire life to never enjoy it.
Watching grey's Anatomy has night really spoke to me. Meredith was lying in bed. She refuses to get up for work. She is waiting for death. "we think we have forever but we don't" aptly describes how i was feeling the entire day.
Its not a matter of just chaning job because i sure love my job though it leaves me a pauper. haha. Its just the entire idea of working, so that i can afford certain things in the unpredictable future, totally puts me off. Because as much as i am aware that life isn't forever, i also know that the future is highly volatile.
so what do i do now?
a serious life...
: oh no what happened to your finger?
f: I cut it(Patted him on the shoulder, looks him in the eye):
Sometimes, life can be hard. But you don't have to do this.*he looks confused*
anyway, if u wanted to commit suicide, this isn't the way to do it. Not on the thumb, try the wrist instead. It works better this way.that was totally lame, i know. Sometimes, its self amusement. I think life is too serious. too boring. harmless stuff like these can be tolerated once in a while, especially when i feel a little hyper =)
The Waffle Girl
I recalled this incident that has always tickled me. The incident of the missing waffle piece...
It happened in my final year in university. it was a very stressful time with a project to complete and my usual lunch hour was 5pm. One day, in lab, i asked YS "hey i am going to the canteen to get a quick bite, do u want to come along?"
"Err, ok i have 10minutes"
We headed to the canteen, there i bought snacks and she ordered a waffle. When she received it, she gave it a kind of quick inspection and immediately said to me,
"hey, why is there a hole here?" Pointing to the corner of the waffle where a little square was missing.
It was obviously because when the waffle was being made, there wasn' enough waffle mix to fulfill, oops i mean fill, the last "square". But YS was clearly unhappy about it, i could tell from that crease in her forehead.
She turned back to the stall, and i heard her asking the waffle seller in mandarin about the "hole" in the waffle. i thought to myself that this was going to take quite a while, and also feeling slightly embarrassed, i took a seat. Meanwhile, i could hear the waffle seller trying to explain to her that its ok, the waffle is still edible, it was just something that happened in the making process... (i guess if u like hand made stuff, there really isn't that much QC).
After some time, she turned to leave the stall. The frown was still there though. One the way back to the lab, she told me, in a very dissatisfied manner'
"such poor quality waffle! I will never buy from them again!"
Boy! did she sound totally crossed.
And i thought she was so wierd.
By some stroke of fate, we are now working in the same company. She continues to baffle me, but we get along pretty ok. I like to remind her of the Waffle Incident to which she has absolutely no recollection of. She insists that I made it up and planted such a memory in her head! argh.. women!!!!
She accuses me of remembering such wierd incidents about her ("Why do you always remember such wierd things that i don't recall?"). I tell her because those are the ones which really stand out. Which really makes her different from everyone else. Seriously, how many people do u know, will go confront someone over a waffle with a missing square?
balsamic vinegar
my bottle of balsamic vinegar solidified!
i engaged on googling how that could happen.
No one talks about solidified vinegar.
Mystified.
I went to check the contents of my vinegar -- urgh! it has artificial coloring! it has sugar!
i think it caramalized!
Labels: food
i gained and i lose
Last week was a really busy week. There was training to attend, presentation to prepare for and an imaging course in the following week. So i stayed at work till real late almost everyday, and went home for dinner at like 10pm. Which is late, and eating late dinners at old age is unhealthy and after a week of such practice, i notice a bulge...
utterly depressing.
On monday, after my presentation, i felt rather nauseaus. By night, i was lying in bed totally curled up in pain. What followed was a night of aches, and muscle convulsions, fever. I didn't eat for a whole day, lose appetite for another whole day.
I think that bulge is gone.
No, i am no anorexic.
I had stomach flu.
procrastination
I admit that I am one of those people who tend to procrastinate. One of the things which i have been putting off for a very long time is cleaning my room. this is probably something which i have been putting off for the last 10 years! Yet, there are times when i just can't stand it when people whine about something that they want to do, but yet have not done. I have a friend who told me that she has been wanting to learn German for over 8 years but never got around to doing that till 3months ago. Good for her. Then there is another friend who said she wanted to roller blade but needs to get a pair of skates before that. I was suggesting places where she could go buy them but she keeps coming up with excuses not to do so. i mean, if that is something you really wanted to do, why come up with so many excuses? surely, you can make some time, make some lee way for that?
I don't know. I just don't see the point in complaining about something you really want to do but you don't seem to be trying hard to want to do it. its as if complaining about it has become something of a hobby instead.
If you REALLY want to do something, you WILL try very hard to do it instead of just sitting on your ass and talking about it. IF thats is all you are doing, then stop complaining because obviously, you don't want to do it THAT badly.
Maybe, its some sort of human inertia.
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Clueless about Subtle conversation
: Hey, shall we make it a point to not use gloves on our microscope?
Y: err.. why don't you ask E first? cos she is the one who is more particular about this...I went to look for E and asked her
:Hey lets not wear gloves when we use the scope, are you ok with that?
E: ya if everyone agrees, sure.Me to Y
:E says she is ok with it
Y: but u know, there are some people who never use gloves no matter what...I think about it...
: so you think we should use gloves? Which means it doesn't matter what E thinks because either way, you would have been concern about the "other people" who's hands are not clean? Why didn't u just say so??Exasperation! Why make me go speak to E, and to revert to her to only hear that she doesn't agree?
bread and Humps
4 buns in 4 hrs.Thats how much bread i can eat. Just because BreadTalk is having their anniversary promotion, and all breads go for $1, I've just had so much bread today. Here's my day's menu...
i woke at 12 (hehe.. its a rare sunday), had a pumpkin seed bun with coffee.about 3 hours later I ate the chocolate crossiant. An hour passes before i reached for the tuna bun... another hour later, i took a bite of the ham&cheese bun.
Man can surely live on bread alone la..
gay friend: All straight men are bastards and therefore, should be treated like one
Alex: but women like bastards!
At East Coast Part, there are these paths for cyclist with humps along the way. On the ground were these words "hump"... some distance later "ahead". Friend was was walking in the opposite direction goes...
"I'm going to get 'A Head'"
walks a bit more...
"and then, i'll get 'Humped' !!"
Tipsy people do get rather creative. Again, have i mentioned that if the government will allow pot, singaporeans could really improve on our arts scene by leaps and bounds. I wonder, if there is any studies done on such correlation. Then again, how does one measure "creativity"? There is Intelligent Quotient, Emotional Quotient, how about a CQ? maybe there is but i'm just too uninformed.
Labels: food
The Little Things: Cringe
Reading
This just reminded me of this guy. Sometimes I feel rather mean when I laugh at it but i really can't help it. It goes like this: 3 of us were in the lecture theatre for a symposium, it was wierd that only the seats on the left of the aisle were occupied...
: Let sit on the other side. Whats wrong with it anyway? Its totally empty!
E: ya ok ok, maybe we should ask someone.. Hey Y, is it ok if we sit there?
Y: Ya, i guess its ok, but maybe its better if you fulfill (this is no typo error) the seats here first before moving to the other side.
*E burst into laughter*
: (to E )argh, so mean..
E: (to Y ) you mean to FILL the seats? (to sound better) You must be nervous about your presentation later? I mean FULFILL is a mistake right?
Y: *laughing* ya ya...
2 weeks later, at a bbq, Y was going on about how we should "fulfill" some places first before etc etc....
Now, i just call him the "fulfilling guy"
Yooohoooooo!!
Way to go Italy!!! =)
I expected Germany to win but heh, it was a good game.
I foresee many unhappy faces later at work.
apache blessings
one of those random surfing i was doing and look what i found!!
Blessing of the Apache. how sweet. So where did it come from? the Apaches? I was looking for the origins of it...
“Now you will feel no rain,
for each of you will be shelter for the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now there will be no loneliness,
for each of you will be companion to the other.
Now you are two persons,
but there is only one life before you.
May beauty surround you both in the journey ahead and through all the years.
May happiness be your companion and your days together be good and long
upon the earth.”
“Treat yourselves and each other with respect,
and remind yourselves often of what brought you together.
Give the highest priority to the tenderness,
gentleness and kindness that your connection deserves.
When frustration, difficulties and fear assail your relationship,
as they threaten all relationships at one time or another,
remember to focus on what is right
between you, not only the part which seems wrong.
In this way, you can ride out the storms
when clouds hide the face of the sun in your lives --
remembering that even if you lose sight
of it for a moment, the sun is still there.
And if each of you takes responsibility for the quality
of your life together, it will be marked by abundance and delight.”
My favourite: Kahlil Gibran on Marriage
From Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet
Then Almitra spoke again and said, And what of Marriage, Master?
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.
No, i am not getting married. Somtimes when you are searching for something you get side tracked into something else. I was looking for the lyrics to a very old song when i came across a site written by a couple who fell in love via the internet and were happily married in japan. Their wedding vows were on their homepage and i thot it was so nice and that spurred on the search on the origins of the apache blessings. Can't find much on that i was swarmed by all those "wedding stuff" sites.
I like the Kalil one simply because it talks about a union that is not too stifling.
"love one another, but not make a bond of love"
nice huh?
